Eastcide

Some interesting synchronicity happening within my perception. Ironic would be neither inaccurate nor inappropriate in describing the latest episode.

I live and work in Vancouver's Downtown Eastside (DTES). It is a distinct and unique neighborhood. There really is no other place quite like it. It is also quite notorious.



It is the drugs that have given this community it's reputation. There is nowhere else in the Western Hemisphere quite like the DTES. On the corner of Main and Hastings (Pain & Wasting) is located one of the world's most infamous open-air drug markets. Any and every drug you could think of is available for purchase. Licit and illicit. There is also a Police Station two doors down. It's a crazy place.

Stay down here long enough and you will witness humanity at it's lowest. This is the original skid row - literally. The phrase was coined here a century ago when the town was driven by the lumber industry, and the area was full of lumber yards (skids).

Only a couple years ago I wallowed here myself, but now I am a survivor blazing a new trail - which others are also striking out on. But there are challenges.

My new outlook has created certain vulnerabilities which some people are quick to pick up on. The biggest one is that I tend to think the best of people and always prefer to give the benefit of the doubt. I have fallen for a few stories of recovery and of people "getting their lives back on track" that later turned out to be pure B.S. made up to illicit sympathy and money. I never get upset when this happens, but I do become a little more wary around those that "get" me in this manner. I consider it my idiot tax. When I get taken I figure I have paid them to leave me alone until they get their shit together.

I never let it change my behaviour to others. I do not pay this negative crap forward. The buck stops here. I only pay forward positive behaviour. It would be easy to justify cynicism, distrust and fear. But I believe that only contributes to the problem, and actually detracts from the kind of solutions I feel are worth working for.

This weekend a man I know, and had even befriended, broke into my home and absconded with some electronics of mine which I had purchased only a few days prior. It would have been easy for me to get angry and upset over my "senseless and meaningless victimization. If I believed it. I don't.

The entire episode is for me packed full of meaning. I can't say "it makes no sense" either. And I really can't say I feel victimized. Something unpleasant happened to me - yes. I may even have been preyed upon. But I don't really like a victim. Plaintiff perhaps. Complainant. Not a victim.

I could have taken more steps to prevent it. AND I had been worrying it would happen the whole time since I acquired it. My prayers were answered - they usually are. I think I have a pretty good connection with the big guy which is why I always need to be extra careful with my thoughts.

I am not saying this is proof of anything - such as the theory that bad thoughts attract bad consequences. I don't really know what I am saying. Just saying is all..

All sorts of good has and will come out of all this. A flaw in the building security has been exposed (and dealt with). The perpetrators have been caught (but not beaten, despite the temptation) and charged. My gear will be replaced - my landlord is my employer and it was their fault. They have decided to keep me happy. And a few other details all for the good.

I learned more about myself, about addiction, and people in general. In the end it is all good. Besides, it's just stuff.

http://ferenczyram.blogspot.com - my personal blog
http://ferenczypre.blogspot.com/ - webOS & Palm
http://ferenczymu.blogspot.com/ - youtube mashups

-- Sent from my palm Pre